Swemex

IT'S OVER!!!!!

2005-12-16T20:50:00.000-08:00

School, that is, not my relationship...It sure got close. I came home from my last day of school, and he was waiting for me, ready with terms of break up. We worked out custody arrangements, and some other things. Finally it dawned on him that I was going along with it, quite eagerly. He said: Are we really through? I assured him we were. Then he changed his tune! He didn't wanna lose me, he promised to change...we'll see. I'm still getting a check in February that I can use for a place of my own, if the relationshp hasn't actually improved by then. I was going to have to wait that long anyway. How do you know what the hell to do?

I am going to Houston for a "Red Tent" weekend with my good friends Theresa and Shannon. Actually Theresa doesn't know what it is, but she's fixin' to be clued in. It is a great book, but I forgot who wrote it. It is about the Old Testament , from the perspective of Jacob's wives. The Red Tent was where the menstruating women had to go to seclude themselves from the men, which was like a monthly mini vacation! Visiting, gossiping, and good friendships.

I'm going to go for now, I'm so sleepy...and I'm at work!

What will I do?

2005-12-06T14:24:00.000-08:00

I am so sick of arguing, and fighting. The best, though not the easiest, solution seems to be to split up. But whenever I mention that, he threatens that I will be leaving alone. He will fight me for full custody, since I don't have a real job, no housing, and I only have time to study. What a pickle! But yet he says that if I'm only staying with him for the sake of the kids, that he doesn't want to stay together for that reason. Men. Why? If we split up, I'm going to be single for a long time, and when I finally do date again, it will only be women with PhD's!!!

A bullfighter bites the dust...for the last time

2005-11-30T12:55:00.000-08:00

Our good friend Greg Crabtree died yesterday, Nov. 29, 2005, in a freak bulldozer accident. Greg was a worldclass friend and bullfighter who fought bulls all over the country, and for the PBR. We miss you Greg and can't believe that you are gone so suddenly. Rodeos won't be the same without you, bud! So sorry you're gone...

Too busy...again!

2005-11-29T08:25:00.000-08:00

I am merely breezing past my blog today...exams are coming...must study..must breathe...

Sick..of it all, but mainly men..my man in particular!

2005-11-22T11:45:00.000-08:00

Everthing is Oh, so unfair!
I get along with me, why can't he?!

In addition to catching crap, day in and day out at home, I have also succeeded in making myself sick from trying to finish homework and projects on time. Geez, what a spazz I am...Can't stop thinking that I would be happier by myself, just me and my girl...

I'm so tired...

2005-11-15T13:18:00.000-08:00

The theme song for the week is sung by Madeleine Kahn in the movie "Blazing Saddles". It relates directly to the title of this post. Things are good, though. Just wiped out, mentally and physically. I feel like sitting in a corner and drooling for awhile, here at the asylum, I mean college. I've got so much homework, and a huge A&P test tomorrow. My weekend is irrevocably dedicated to my career report. I've changed my mind about that, by the way. I now want to be a billionaire, with old money, of course, so I can just... be. " Oh, wouldn't it be lov-e-ly, lov-e-ly?" Maybe not...wouldn't mind trying it out, though.

Finally! My adoring public speaks!

2005-11-10T13:54:00.000-08:00

Someone finally responded to my blog! Way to go guys! Your reward will be ...Well, a nice girl like myself just can't write about that!
Ah, am I feeling randy, baby? Yeah!

As the end of the semester is closing in on me, so are my professors. More assignments, more exams, more this, more that...And like a raving lunatic, I've signed up for more of the same!
"They're coming to take me away, ha, ha! They're coming to take me away, he, he!"

Perhaps in the future, my grandchildren can simply download the college credits they need for their chosen career, onto a convenient computer chip in their brains. Then they can have more time to laugh about Grams' college days stories when she actually had to read assignments, and write papers! Ha,Ha!

It's not so bad, all the time. I actually enjoy school, I just don't enjoy cleaning up the scrambled brain matter out of my cranium every week...Gives me an excuse to watch Mr. Clean in action, and who minds that, huh? Not I. Come here, baldy!

I just spell checked my blog entry, and the first word it wanted to correct was... blog! Now that is funny!

Time to re-group

2005-11-03T08:39:00.000-08:00

I did not get in to the nursing program this time around. I found out the supposed reasons why not, and I am in good spirits about entrance next fall. My family is still very supportive of my scholastic endeavors, so I trudge on. today I have a big test in Microbiology and I'm feeling pretty good about it, too. I hope I'm right. More later.

Hurray for Library Therapy!!!

2005-10-27T13:39:00.000-07:00

Is there any cooler place on the face of the earth than a well executed library? I can't think of one. I just got done with a mock job-interview for English class, and my nerves were crying out for pleasure! So, I went to the most pleasurable place I can think of, here in Victoria - the Library! It's actually great. They have shelves upon shelves filled with books about snakes, quantum physics, deliciously scandalous novels, books about frogs that go to school, fish that swim upstream, and sex, vietnamese food, and choclate! And if you want, you can sit down at the computer,listen to your favorite swedish radio station while you do your homework. Now, if they had bunks here so you could lay down and take a little nap, aaahhh!

I'm going crazy...And it's not as much fun as I thought it would be...

2005-10-25T08:00:00.000-07:00

I don't know why professional jugglers don't go around to businesses and give lessons on how to keep thirty glass balls in the air, and still keep a smile on your face! And to think, I have volunteered for TWO more years of this dementia! I'd like to just run away with the next passing band of friendly gypsies. I can't help but to worry that even if I get all my school and home projects done (on time even!) I'd probably forget to put pants on the day of a presentation! Or try to serve my family some saute'd career report with a side of viral pathology! Won't they be impressed! Seriously, the bets reward at the end of this whole ordeal won't be that confounded little piece of paper, but the presence of my family still by my side, and still speaking to me..most of the time!

There is so much I want to do in life, so many hobbies I want to indulge. Oh God, please grant me all the time that I need! And please give peace to me and my family! They are so phenomenal but I know they don't think that I know that...

What a Week !?!$&#!@&%!

2005-10-20T08:29:00.000-07:00

Oh my!
I have survived!
This weeek started, oddly enough, with last weekend. I went to Houston to visit a dying friend. Very sad. He and his wife are good, sweet people, and neither deserve this horrible, slow death he is suffering. The mysteries of God are just that...

After I visited with him, I decided to play hooky from my husband! Instead of going back home to Gonzales, like a good, obedient wifey should, my daughter and I were hidden away in the womanly confines of a figurative red tent - my best friend's apartment! There, the child played with the poor, terrorized chihuahua Rocky ( hats off to that little dog, someone throw him an extra bone...Hell, the whole bag of bones!). The women folk amused themselves with exalting eachothers accomplishments and progress through the past year, laughed outrageously at the downward spiral of Danny Bonaduce, as documented in a tragic reality Tv show, and imbibed luscious wine by the bottles! (Only two, for those of you who are counting!)

The next morning, I packed my progeny up, along with several great gifts from my friend, and clicked my heels, and.....ended back up in cow town....what a jipp! My husband was a little confused by my brief time out, but had surprisingly few comments about it. Good for him! We both benefitted from it...

AARRGHH!!!!!

2005-10-13T07:51:00.000-07:00

Well, that just about covers it, really.

More when I've recovered...

Life...ain't no stoppin' it!

2005-10-07T20:48:00.000-07:00

So, I made it through another week of college. I had three tests in various Biology classes. While testing, I experienced brief moments of clarity, and actually knew (and understood!) what the right answer was. Then everything went blurry and all the info. melted together to form new, unexpected answers. My dreams of A's in either class are gone, but two solid B's shouldn't be out of my reach. I hope!

I have to decide!!!

2005-09-29T11:13:00.000-07:00

I have been irrevocably put on the spot by my English professor: I have to pick ONE career and research it! What will it be...? There are so many things I'd like to do, so many subjects I'd like to study, but only one lifetime! AAARRGGHH!!! Yes, I am one of those people who, if they won the lottery, would disappear into academia, never to be seen again. But certainly heard from and read! I would be digging in Machu Pichu, or coughing quietly behind dusty bookshelves in an ancient German, Greek, British, etc library. I'd also get fat because I would surely have to eat on my world travels through academia. That means lots and lots of local fare..Yum! Dates, baklava, crepes, wine, olives, fish, puddings, ale, veal, salads, more wine, can't forget cheese...aahhh! Please God, let me be able to do some of this, either in this lifetime or the next. Meanwhile, I'll contemplate being a ...book editor...nurse practicioner...brothel madam...the list never ends!

At work...bleh!

2005-09-17T21:32:00.000-07:00

Well, another fun filled weekend has passed at Gonzales Hospital! Tomorrow, after I catch up on my sleep I have a kid's B-day party to attend- Yeah!
I'm supposed to be studying about one-celled organisms, chemistry as related to Microbiology, and other subjects way too intense for public discusssion..snore..
On a slightly more risque note, I did have time this weekend to confess to a very good friend of mine that I've been in love with him ever since I can remember...We are both firmly attached to our respective spouses, and that is as it should be...I found out that he is having some bad heart problems and his mortality suddenly became very appearent to me. So, I had to tell him. I hope he is flattered and not freaked out. We shall see...

If I Could Stop One Heart From Breaking

IF I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain;
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain.

Emily Dickinson

Monday morning!

2005-09-13T07:59:00.001-07:00

I have just completed the first class of the day- YOGA! It feels so good! Now I'm at the computer, checking all my little web spots, sipping delicious hot coffee! I'm currently trying to get into a carpool at the college I'm attending. I live an hour and 15 minutes away from the campus, and w/ the current gas prices being what they are, my budget is being murdered. I've had to drop all my discretionary spending, like food! Back to Ramen noodles! It's not so bad if you add some vegetables, some cut up hot dog, and squeeze half a lime into the soup. But then again, I am closely related to Mikey- I will eat anything!
I did more soul-searching over the weekend- I had more time than usual b/c I was sick, still am. My searching ended in yet another dream career, one that I've considered since grade school, but wrote off b/c everyone around me said it's not a "real" job-interior designer. It is frustrating to want to wear three or four different hats, and only possess ONE head! However, since my employer, a small country hospital, is paying for my Registered Nurse education, I'd be silly to throw it away. The medical field is BOOMING and I will always be guaranteed a steady job, with a great salary and benefits. I can still pursue my dream once I actually start working with my degree. So, my dreams of being a freelance journalist, an accomplished murder mystery writer, college history professor and interior designer (Whew!) will not die, only lay slumbering for a while longer!
Pictured here are my reasons for going to school and finishing, no matter what!

Can't think of anything more fun!

2005-09-07T13:16:00.000-07:00

I'm spending the day filling out college loan apps, childcare assistance apps, and studying Anatomy and Physiology, and Microbiology...stop me before I get too crazy! I'm at my local teeny, tiny country library here in Good Golly Gonzales, Tx, and a large group of kids and a couple pf grown ups walked in asking for library cards. Guess what? They're from New Orleans! I don't think there will be a spot on this continent that will be untouched by that terrible storm with the beautuiful name! What these United States could use is certainly a little touch of the Big Easy! i just hope they can find happiness and purpose in their new lives and new world.

I'm 30 and I STILL don't know what I want to be when I grow up!

2005-09-03T21:39:00.000-07:00

I have spent the weekend researching various careers, but I can't settle on just one! Perhaps
I'm destined to be a perpetual student. I'm stuck between historian and registered nurse. I'm supposed to narrow the field down so that I can do a project for my technical writing class in college. Seeing as I'm there to complete the ADN program, maybe I should explore my (for now) chosen field more in depth. Fine, that settles it! When I grow up, I will (maybe ) be an Obstetrical nurse! Wish me luck and if you are an OB nurse, let me know how life is treating you!

Unsure

2005-09-01T09:20:00.000-07:00

Here it goes!
This blog will focus on aspects of what I consider to be a dream job- being a college professor! I am aiming towards human Growth and Development, with particular interest in the gerontology field. I am currently attending Victoria College in Texas to complete the ADN program, but I'm not sure that I want to be a registered nurse for the rest of my life. I am more interested in what life forces shape people, especially in old age, and how understanding the dynamics of old age might be useful in improving certain aspects of it. If you have anything to chime in with, feel free!